flonnebonne | [Slam Dunk] Ficlet: Sock It To Me

For

juin, for guessing one of my fics correctly in

blind_go round 1 yadda yadda yadda. She requested RuHana and old socks. Some minor changes from the original version.

Sock It To Me

"Oi, kitsune! Your stupid socks have holes in them."

Rukawa didn't even look up. He was busy taking off his right shoe.

"How old are they? Did your father used to wear them?"

Rukawa took off his left shoe.

"Ever thought about throwing them away? Make the world a happier place?"

Rukawa put his shoes in his locker.

"I bet they smell like rotten eggs. 'Cause your feet smell like rotten eggs, get it? Ha ha ha ha ha!"

Rukawa pushed Sakuragi's face away so he could rummage around in his locker.

"Have you checked for mold? I heard a guy got castrated for foot fungus once."

Rukawa took out his shower kit.

"Or maybe he got, you know, amp-yoo-tated. Yeah, that's it."

Rukawa put his shower kit on the bench.

"You suck at basketball now, but you would suck even more without your feet."

Rukawa sat down on the bench and pulled off his right sock.

"Not that I need you to get amp-yoo-tated for me to beat your ass.

Rukawa pulled off his left sock.

"Speaking of ass, you wanna--"

Rukawa stuffed his socks into Sakuragi's big, ugly mouth.

"MmmfFFfhfhfhgghhhmmgff!!!"

Rukawa grabbed his shower kit.

"Mffggmffuuuff your stupid socks in my mouth, asshole!"

Rukawa said without turning around: "I threw them in the garbage like you told me to."

Even as Sakuragi punched him, Rukawa felt like he was making the world a happier place.