flonnebonne: (Stalker)
[personal profile] flonnebonne
Title: Memoirs of a Go Player, Part 1
Fandom: Hikaru no Go

Characters: Touya, Shindou
Genre: Epistolary Humour
Spoilers: Vague ones for some events near the end of the series, but nothing soul-shattering.
Summary: The diary of Touya Akira--that is, if he were a crazy stalker like in all the BL doujinshi.




Memoirs of a Go Player

June 12

Today I caught Waya-san hanging all over Shindou again. They had their arms around each other’s shoulders and everything. I suppose that’s how other boys my age act but I still had to get Shindou away from there. So I told him that his yose technique in his last game had been horrible (it really was) and he left Waya-san just like that to play a game with me. Waya-san gave me a dirty look but what else is new.

Oh, and I made it to the semi-finals of the Gosei tournament today.



June 17

Shindou mentioned that he played a game with Yashiro last week when he was in town. Why wasn’t I invited? Obviously because Yashiro was making his move.

Damn Yashiro and his first-hand tengens.



June 20

Bad day today. Shindou and I were watching a game between Isumi 2-dan and Ashiwara-san when Shindou started bragging about how Isumi-san passed the pro exam without a single loss. I pointed out that I could have done the same if not for...certain distractions. Then Isumi-san played an unusual hand (unusual for him; his play is pretty predictable) and Shindou kept saying about how great the move was. I told him black was being too aggressive and white would reverse things in the next five hands and Shindou insisted on arguing with me about it, but we never saw what happened because we got thrown out of the Go Institute. They told us to get a room. I don’t see why they didn’t just let us go to a different room in the Institute if that was their intention. There are lots of spare rooms.

I have never been so humiliated in my life, although that time last week when Ichikawa-san almost threw us out of my father’s Go parlour was almost as bad. Oh well, it was probably for the best. Wouldn’t want Shindou slobbering over Isumi-san too much. Or Ashiwara-san for that matter.



June 21

I wish Kuwabara-sensei weren’t so chummy with Shindou. My feelings aside, it’s just creepy.



July 2

Ogata-sensei asked Shindou for a private match. At his apartment. Where he keeps his good sake. And Shindou agreed. Right in front of me.

I’m bringing my binoculars tonight.



July 3

All I could see was that they played a few speed games in the living room before they went into the kitchen for dinner. They didn’t come out again after that.

I think Ogata-sensei might have been playing his Prince CD. Curse him.



July 9

Ko Yong-Ha emailed me again about you-know-who’s phone number. Obviously my junk mail filter isn’t working properly.

Qualified for the Meijin league today. I’ll get that title from Ogata-sensei if it’s the last thing I do before seducing Shindou.



July 15

Father’s back from China. The first thing he asked about was whether I could set up a match with Shindou for him.

Not you too, father. I’m starting to feel like a pimp.



July 15

I don’t think I have to worry about Shindou’s insei friends anymore. I caught Waya-san and Isumi-san making out in the Room of Profound Darkness.



July 16

Why do people have so little respect for the sanctity of the Institute nowadays?

Ochi was doing his tapping routine in a bathroom stall as usual (he lost to Kadowaki 2-dan) but he didn’t lock the door properly and anyone could see inside. When I came in he was doing something indecent in there. I guess the tapping was to cover up the noise? I tried to find out if he was thinking of Shindou while he was doing it but he just slammed the door on me.

Insei are like cockroaches. Just when you think you’ve gotten rid of them...



July 21

Ichakawa-san interrupted our game today to ask Shindou if he has a girlfriend. I wish Ichikawa-san would find someone her own age. Shindou said he doesn’t have a girlfriend but he was blushing.

This bears investigation.



July 23

After some prompting, Shindou’s mother mentioned an old friend of Shindou’s named Fujisaki Akari who lives just a couple of blocks away from his house. I think I remember meeting her once or twice at Haze. Pretty girl. Damn it.

I found her address in the phone book and I’ll be paying a short visit tomorrow. At least, I think it's her address. There are a few Fujisaki households in the area. Why does Shindou have to know so many people? This is getting to be a lot of work.



July 24

Fujisaki said the one Shindou likes is me?



July 25

Shindou said the one he likes is me!

But I didn’t get to ask him if he meant it the way I think he meant it because he ran away as usual. He is such an elusive mystery. Will I never be able to unravel Shindou Hikaru’s secrets?

I got eliminated from the Mejin league today.



July 31

I told Shindou I like him back.

Then I beat him by eight and a half moku playing white. He broke up with me on the spot but later on he phoned to say he was sorry.

Winner: me!

Except I still have to find out what went on between Shindou and Ogata-sensei.



- End -


Go to Part 2

Date: 2006-03-03 11:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elfiepike.livejournal.com
ahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahah. The diary of Touya Akira--that is, if he were a crazy stalker like in all the BL doujinshi. indeed! XD

Date: 2006-03-03 11:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jen-kat.livejournal.com
That was a fun read. :D

A couple typos:
-Ogata-sensei asked Shindout for a private match.
-Ichakawa-san interruped our game today to ask Shindou if he has a girlfriend.

Date: 2006-03-04 12:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] harumi.livejournal.com
Precisely the reason why Stalker!Akira drives me nuts and makes me semi-frightened when I look at doujinshi. ^^;;;

I had to look at this parody though, and it was hilarious...if, er...it's supposed to be a parody.

It'd be funny to read a similar one from Shindou's point of view too.

Date: 2006-03-05 08:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] harumi.livejournal.com
I'll think about it. ^_^

Date: 2006-03-04 02:06 am (UTC)
ext_49754: My main icon, depicting Heero and Duo hugging and says 1=2, Try, Try, Try, and hostilecrayon. (Default)
From: [identity profile] hostilecrayon.livejournal.com
Then I beat him by eight and a half moku playing white. He broke up with me on the spot but later on he phoned to say he was sorry.

Winner: me!


Hahahaha! I can just see their relationship... break up everyday over a game of Go... >.>;; Hahahaha.

Date: 2006-03-04 03:11 am (UTC)
troisroyaumes: Painting of a duck, with the hanzi for "summer" in the top left (Default)
From: [personal profile] troisroyaumes
Ahahaha, Touya, you're so obsessed and don't you know it. This was a wonderfully hilarious fic! XD

(Oh, I don't know if I ever got around to commenting on that Ender's Game crossover you wrote a few months ago, but I still have it bookmarked because I absolutely loved it.)

Date: 2006-03-04 05:48 am (UTC)
ext_7903: (Default)
From: [identity profile] ramble-corner.livejournal.com
oh that's hillarious XDXD
Love it very much.
*chuckle at the thought of stalker!Touya

Date: 2006-03-04 11:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] celen.livejournal.com
Aww, absolutely good fic.. And I laughed SO much. Akira the stalker. ^^ But he and Shindou are just so damn cute together (as well as Isumi and Waya)! <3 Loved this.

Date: 2006-03-04 02:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stareater22.livejournal.com
Insei are like cockroaches. Just when you think you’ve gotten rid of them...

Ehehehehehehe, this fic cracked me up so much that I couldn't stop laughing for one minute.

*thumbs up* ^__^

Date: 2006-03-04 08:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tilderific.livejournal.com
Oh goodness, I loved your Akira in this- crazy stalker indeed. I adore the way you made him sound so systematic and matter-of-fact.

Not you too, father. I’m starting to feel like a pimp.

That made me snerk. Alot. ♥

Kee, I'm always so amused by your fics, and I figured I might as well come out of my corner of the world and actually comment for once. I swear I'm not a stalker. Er. Maybe. :D

Date: 2006-03-04 10:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jgal87.livejournal.com
hahaha...this is so amusing XDDD

Date: 2006-03-05 01:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] juin.livejournal.com
I’m starting to feel like a pimp. = AHAHAHAHA.

Date: 2006-03-05 06:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justkat2790.livejournal.com
Hee hee!! July 25 - 4 lines for winning Shindou, and 1 line for losing the Mejin League - now that's stalking!^_^ Very funny!! And I love the idea of them making up and breaking up over every game...so true!! Thanks for sharing!^___^

Date: 2006-03-06 03:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shinra-lackey.livejournal.com
[livejournal.com profile] flonnebonne, the sad thing is, I agree with you about Touya being more of a stalker than is humanly possible to portray. Think about it! He missed one of his Pro matches for the boy! And he goes after him at Haze and peeks into the science room window looking for him. I bet if the rest of the go club wasn't there, he would have just pounced on him then and there.

Also, I think I'm mentally scarred from Akira's entry about Ochi. Mentally. Scarred.

Date: 2006-03-07 11:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shinra-lackey.livejournal.com
Don't tell me I'm the only one who thought that Ochi was always doing someone funny in the bathroom? Am I? Damn.

Yes, you were the only one imagining that, but not anymore! Now I won't be able to watch that scene in the anime without having painful flashbacks. Woe. *sends death glares at [livejournal.com profile] flonnebonne

Date: 2006-03-07 01:38 am (UTC)
ext_9800: (Default)
From: [identity profile] issen4.livejournal.com
Extremely pleased to read this. Like, bursting with laughter and sheer enjoyment. I knew there had to be an ulterior motive for Touya to keep stalking Hikaru, but never had I imagined it to be this entertaining. Just wonderful.

Here via [livejournal.com profile] shinra_lackey's rec.

Date: 2006-03-07 03:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] svz-insanity.livejournal.com
I can't believe I forgot to comment on this! :D This was such a fun read, I love your Touya. I'm actually a fan of the "Touya is a stalker" concept when it's well done... and your fic takes the cake. Dear lord, Ochi? *shudders* Well, I'm glad that at least I'm not the only one who thought "... bathrooms, hee hee." (I have the maturity level of a five year old.)

I’m starting to feel like a pimp. Instantly going to my memories. ♥♥

Date: 2006-03-07 08:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] felys-sho.livejournal.com
XD *claps* Very well portrayed. *u*b It's quite true that a lot of BL doujinshi have Touya take stalking to the extremes. XD;; (It scares me sometimes, but it's always a good laugh.)

I’m bringing my binoculars tonight.
ROFL. That made me laugh for 2 minutes straight. *is dork*

Date: 2006-03-09 10:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kayue.livejournal.com
ROFL I knew somebody would write a stalker-Akira fanfic sometime and I so glad you did!

There are so many great lines in this but I'll mention a couple of my faves that no ones commented on yet.

"I wish Kuwabara-sensei weren’t so chummy with Shindou. My feelings aside, it’s just creepy. " At least Akira knows what he is.

And "I’m bringing my binoculars tonight." :D

Date: 2006-03-18 11:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kokkoryuha.livejournal.com
I'm feeling all the past fanfictions I've read coming back to me...
XD
WONDERFUL job! Love your fic!

Date: 2006-03-20 04:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] daisy-chan.livejournal.com
PFFFFFFFFFFFT! This is hilarious! *mems*

Also, would you mind if I made Damn Yashiro and his first-hand tengens into an icon? XD

Date: 2007-04-16 01:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] she-universe.livejournal.com
CLEARLY you win at life.

This Touya? looking up Akari in the phonebook, binoculars, walking on ion Ochi to see if he was thinking of Shindou.

CLEARLY.

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