[Hikaru no Go] Ficlet: Peeping Ping

[flonnebonne]

Written for svz_insanity as a prize for guessing one of my blind_go fics correctly. She requested Waya, Isumi, and something about Le Ping. The original version of this fic was all screwed up because I totally forgot that Le Ping doesn't speak Japanese, duh. The fic should be less stupid now thanks to ai_ling's help!

[Edit] And there's also a second, less linguistically-challenged version of this fic.
[Edit 2] Changed the name of the fic from "Lost in Translation" to "Peeping Ping." Thank you to viridian_magpie for the suggestion!

Peeping Ping

"Waaaaaah!" screamed Le Ping.

"Gyaaaaaah!" screamed Waya as he scrambled to get off Isumi.

"Oh no," groaned Isumi as he sat up and tried to fix his clothes.

Le Ping ran out into the hallway and shouted, "Yang Haaaaaaaaai! Ta men zai ni chuang shang gao guai!"

"Don't tell it to the whole building!" Waya grabbed Le Ping by the back of his shirt and hauled him back into the room.

"Too late," sighed Isumi.

A moment later Yang Hai's head peeked through the doorway. "I heard you from all the way down the hall."

"Yang Hai! Yang Hai!" Le Ping was bouncing all over the place like a monkey on steroids. "Ta men gang cai zai ni chuang shang zuo!"

"My bed?" Yang Hai looked at Isumi, who looked pointedly at the ceiling.

"Shut up! We were not doing it on his bed," yelled Waya while trying to grab Le Ping.

"Hao ba hao ba, zai ling wai yi zhang chuang shang zuo."

"What did you say?"

"He said you were doing it on the other bed then."

"You have no proof," retorted Waya, crossing his arms in front of him.

"Ni cai bu neng zheng ming ni mei you," countered Le Ping, likewise crossing his arms.

"You calling me a liar?"

"Yes!" yelled Le Ping.

"You're the one who's lying!" Waya loomed menacingly over Le Ping.

"Liar liar liar!" Le Ping climbed up on Yang Hai's bed so he could match Waya's height. They stared each other down with identical glares.

"It's so much worse when there are two of them," Isumi said apologetically.

Yang Hai massaged his forehead. "No kidding."

"Look, It's not our fault this pipsqueak is a peeping tom," Waya complained.

"I'm not Peeping Tom, I'm Le Ping!"

Waya tried to grab Le Ping again but the smaller boy was too fast.

"Isumi!" he cried, latching onto Isumi's leg. "Ni yao jia de zuo shen me? Zhen de zai zhe li!"

"What did he say?" Waya demanded.

"He said, 'What do you need this fake for, you have me."

"He doesn't want jailbait," Waya snapped, finally managing to get a hold of Le Ping. "Now get out!"

"Waaah!" wailed Le Ping as he was dragged across the room. He managed to brace himself against the door frame before Waya could throw him out. "Isumi! Help!"

"Um..." Isumi blushed.

Yang Hai did not look amused. "Look, I don't care what you two get up to on the spare bed, just leave my bed alone. And lock the door for chrissakes."

"I'm sorry, Le Ping, I'll play with you another time." Isumi looked away as Yang Hai dragged Le Ping out of Waya's hands and into the hallway, then almost, but not quite, slammed the door on his way out.

"Wo ai ni, wo yao sheng ni de hai zi," came Le Ping's muffled voice through the door. 

"I'm not translating that!"

Isumi clapped his hand over Waya's mouth to prevent him from responding. After a few seconds, they heard footsteps padding away down the hallway, along with a number of curse words in Mandarin, Japanese, Korean and English. Isumi gave an audible sigh of relief and took his hand off Waya's mouth. 

"We're such bad guests," said Isumi.

Waya locked the door, turned around, and immediately put his arms around Isumi's shoulders.

"You're still in the mood after all that?"

"Especially after all that," growled Waya, pushing Isumi onto Yang Hai's bed.

Isumi yelped a little. "Shouldn't we use the other bed?"

"There is no way in hell I'm moving now. And by the way, you are not going to 'play with that brat some other time.'"

* * * * * * *

"We'll see about that," muttered Le Ping.

Yang Hai pressed his ear a little closer against the door. "Shush."

"I told you they were doing it on your bed. Now pay up!"

"Yeah, okay, you'll get your money. Now shut up so I can listen."

Le Ping looked like he was about to say something unflattering about Yang Hai's mother, but instead he, too, pressed his ear against the door.

-End-

---

A/N: "Wo ai ni, wo yao sheng ni de hai zi," the line that Yang Hai refused to translate, means "I love you, I want to have your child!"

Major props to ai_ling for translating all those lines into Mandarin for me!

Comments

[love]

<3 It's even funnier this way!

[flonnebonne]

I hope you won't want to kill me, but issen4 suggested re-writing the fic from Yang Hai's POV since he understands both Mandarin and Japanese. So...I could take out the parts you translated. I want to try it out, if you don't mind? It might make the story flow better for the non-Mandarin speakers. Or it might just fall flat on its face, we'll see.

I hope this doesn't offend you! :(

[love]

Up to you, dear. I look forward to reading it whenever you're done. ^_^

[flonnebonne]

Phew! Okay, here's the second version, hope it's up to snuff.

http://flonnebonne.livejournal.com/27507.html

[love]

<3 *worships you, has your babies*

[issen4.livejournal.com]

Nice scene! The Chinese took a while to figure out--my fault, I'm bad at reading stuff from pinyin. I couldn't help wondering... if you wrote it from Yang Hai's viewpoint, you wouldn't need to translate anything, as Yang Hai understands both?

[flonnebonne]

*headdesks* Yes, that would totally work. Why didn't I think of that? Thanks for the idea! I'm going to try it out.

[juin.livejournal.com]

Wo ai ni, wo yao sheng ni de hai zi!!

PS. I may or may not have burst an internal organ from laughing too hard.

[flonnebonne]

Don't worry, you don't need your appendix anyway.

I take it you know Mandarin?

[juin.livejournal.com]

Enough to understand this fic without the translations, yeah. XD

[chibikoji.livejournal.com]

Fantastic XD

It's been ages since I read any Go fics - and what a one to come back on ... so funny!

I liked the language differences - it's more amusing than being told exactly what's going on ... lol

Good work! More?? ^_^

[flonnebonne]

Glad you enjoyed!

I probably won't be continuing this fic...I have no inspiration and I'm actually kind of sick of this fic because I had to rewrite it twice. XD But I'm flattered that you would want to see a sequel!

[spectre-infanta.livejournal.com]

I burst out laughing at the "Wo ai ni, wo yao sheng ni de hai zi" line. XD Is Le Ping that innocent or just trying to rile up the others?

[flonnebonne]

That line seems to be a lot funnier in Mandarin for some reason (wish I could speak the language!).

I think Le Ping isn't particularly innocent, although I remember when I was that age I would repeat a lot of naughty words I didn't fully understand. I will knew they were bad though.

[spectre-infanta.livejournal.com]

Well, it's more of "I love you, I want to give birth to your child!", which is sort of more direct and less refined than the phrase "bear your child".

Ehh, I also don't know why it's funny -- it just is. Random and out of the blue. Plus, it reminds me of the times when I was a kid and asking why guys can't get pregnant and why I couldn't marry my favourite (female) cousin. >D

Oh, maybe it's because to those who know Mandarin Chinese, we understand what sort of crazy thing Le Ping's saying immediately and in a last attempt to stop himself from getting dragged out. And those who don't have to wait until the end of the fic to find out, and perhaps that lessens the effect...

[tintinvoyageur.livejournal.com]

ohmygod.

i read both fics (the original in chinese, and the one with the translated lines) and since i know chinese, i have to admit it, but the chinese one SO WINS. xDD Somehow it seems funnier when Le Ping is speaking in chinese ("Wo ai ni, wo yao sheng ni de hai zi!!") because of the pure fact that Waya can't understand that. :D

WIN. i love this fic! :D

[flonnebonne]

Thanks! ai_ling did a fantastic job on the translation...I wish I knew Chinese so much. -_-